11.12.03
4:15 p.m.
The sprained ankle isn't going well. I keep tripping on things and hurting it again. Today, i had to take the car in to get the brakes fixed...that went well. But coming back to the apartment, one of the crutches slipped, and i put full weight on the foot. OUCH!!!!!!!!!! Did i say that loud enough. I sat on the sidewalk, in the wet, screaming in pain. Probably scared the boi half to death. It's raining today. Crutches and wet don't get along. I was being really careful, but it was one of those accidents. I go see the P.A. tomorrow to get the pain medication. I refused it at first. I can deal with the pain, i really can, but then it got to be too much, especially after today.
I only hope it's not raining tomorrow, don't need a repeat incident.
About the brakes. I found a good shop, with a nice manager. Came with two recommendations, one from a good friend, and the other from my mobile mechanic. We had to replace the rotors as well as the pads. The boi followed me over in his truck. We had to wait around to speak to Master about the financial stuff. He's off now paying for it. Then they'll have to go back and pick the car up tonight. Because i'm not going back out there. With the rain, and the wet and blah blah blah. I am just very thankful that we have j here to help, especially since my clutz factor has increased a hundred fold with the injury.
It's going well with the supervision. And I'm starting to swing into Daddy mode. The first several days were very strange for me. But as we talk and learn more about each other, the Daddy in me is starting to respond. I am resisting the emotional attachment, and i'm really really trying not to get used to this. But both Master and i are getting used to it. The longer he's here, the harder it will be to send him away.
Master decided it would probably be a good thing to have him come back. He's going back to Denver for a few days and then coming back down for another stay so we can get more done. And just the day to day stuff that needs to be done. Dishes, cleaning, vacuuming, bathrooms, iguana care, cat care. My ankle isn't going to be healed any time soon, and just when i'm getting the hands under control! I'm getting antsy about getting back to work. I need to find a kitchen i can fit into. I think it will be possible. The resort right up the street was hiring a few weeks ago. Maybe they'll be ready to hire in January.
And it's not just a money issue--getting back to work. I miss it. I miss the excitement, the fun, the stress, the fire. I like cooking things and banging pots and pans around and working with other chefs. I didn't think i would miss it like this. Maybe it's just because i can't cook in our house as well...*sigh*
I've been thinking about the switch up, between having a boi during the day, and then having Master in the evenings. Around Master, i am boy, around the boi, I am Daddy. It's not necessarily a mind fuck, but it is something i am definately not used to. If he were MY boi, it would be a lot different between us, i'd be much more of a Daddy then i am now. But he is someone who came here to serve us for a short period of time. I am not in Top mode around Master, so it makes it hard to remember that i have a boi to order around and do things for me. (how i tripped and hurt the ankle the other night, i forgot about telling him to go get the clothes for the laundry). Master asked if i had anything to be washed, and i did, so i got up to get it, and tripped over my shoes. Boi was like "that's what i'm here for." Ok, so it is kind of a mind fuck being in between like this. I like it, but i'm not used to it. And then i get into boy mode around Master, and wonder how the boi is doing emotionally about seeing Daddy be a boy.
Very hard to explain. Unless you are in it...!!
'Nuff for now, need to go put the foot up again...(laptop would be nice, huh?)
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11.10.03
2 p.m.
Ok, so not good on keeping the promise of keeping up the writing. Having a boi to supervise during the day takes lots of time. So much is getting done, but it's progressing much more slowly then i thought. Some of it due to the fact that Master needs to be here to figure out what to put where. Then yesterday was "Matrix" day. The boi brought us a vcr/dvd combo player. So i took a gift certificate i received for my birthday last summer and bought "Reloaded." We watched "Matrix" & "Reloaded", while eating pizza. Then went off to the theatre to see "Revolutions." The added plus to this day was that a friend decided to join us. We were at a party Sat. night, and Her g/f was going to be gone all Sunday, so she came over and spent the night, then did the "Matrix" day with us.
It was fun. I like doing marathons like that. (i used to do it with "Mad Max"). We started at 9:00 a.m., and were done by 7 p.m. Well there were a few breaks in between, like when Master had to go purchase the "Reloaded" dvd. The boi went to pick up our pizza. So we didn't have to stop for that. So absolutely nothing got done yesterday except for a few things put away in the closet. We are getting ready to steam clean the floors. The boi worked on the living room floor while we were at the movie yesterday.
It's very, very strange having someone else do my "jobs." Not that i am good at housecleaning or anything (remember, i am a chef slave!). But getting stuff organized, and toting and carrying are things i am very good at. Not used to someone else doing them for me. I am used to being the workhorse. The fact that the jobs are getting done is relieving immense stress for me.
The shed is cleaned out, and organized. The closet has been cleaned out and is getting organized. The patio
got cleaned off, the kitchen is staying clean. But Master and i both keep saying "We aren't getting used to this, we aren't getting used to this." Simply because the servant will be going away at the end of the week.
Health Report: Finally saw the dr. this morning about my hands. There is fungus among us. The hands have a fungus, not dermatitis. So all the cream i've been using has been the wrong stuff. In talking about it, Master and i figured i probably contracted in the basement of Her mother's house when i did all that cleaning for her. I am not used to humid, or moldy. Kansas is both. And i cleaned without any kind of gloves. I know better now! The good news is it'll take 4-6 weeks to heal. My particular health plan didn't cover the medication, but the doc gave me samples that will get me through the 4 week period.
Ankle: Don't know yet. I have an air cast now. And staying off of it as much as i can. (movies and dr. appts. aside). The doc is supposed to get me to an orthopedic and/or get an MRI scheduled. The problem being that could take weeks as well. He said at least a month for just the sprain to heal. YIKES!!!! So maybe the hands and the feet will heal in conjunction and i can seriously start looking for work by the first of the year. That would make me so very happy. Unemployment won't last forever, and i really am getting antsy to get into a kitchen again, or at least some kind of job.
Master and i are getting along ok with the added unit in our household. The boi is extremely well behaved and obediant. Serves on his knees, doesn't talk back. Does what he is told, and likes the service. These are good qualities in bois. He is also very submissive (unlike me). And that is very strange for me to be around 24/7.
And i am not trying to "abuse" my power. I am being considerate myself, and saying please and thank you. Both Master and i have expressed gratitude in having him here. Our friends want to "borrow" him, but the problem is, he isn't "Ours" to loan out. We told our friends they would have to negotiate with him directly!
Well, i've written enough for now. When i get some more time, i'll rant about the DES Food Stamp Office and how ineffectual they are at this point!
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