12.06.05
8:00 p.m.
Well, I'm feeling much better. After mega-doses of vitamin C, magnesium, pau d' arco, and astragalus, I have beat the acute bronchitis. I still have a lingering cough, but no fever, dizziness, tiredness, or extreme WANT TO SLEEP all day.
The last two or three days have been extremely productive. I cleaned out a closet so that we could move some stuff into it. Took a load of items to Goodwill, did mega loads of laundry, put up bits of shelving things to hold some of our stuff; and the big step: Today I got the iguana cage into the house and put together. I even got all his stuff in there and his lights up. They aren't on timers yet, but they are up. It was the BIG project hanging over my head. That frees up some of the garage so that I can start sorting and weaning. There's more of Mamasita's stuff to be donated. I'll be making quite a few trips to Goodwill in the next two weeks. My goal is to have the christmas stuff donated before the holiday comes, so that people who want these things can buy them, and it goes to homes that want them.
I've been pacing myself so that I don't have a relapse. I am living in wet weather and need to be careful. They are predicting 3-6 inches of snow in the next day or so, and I still haven't driven on icy, snowy roads yet. The time is at hand, I'll have to do it whether I want to or not. Master is hesitant and worried about me driving in snow, but a friend gave me a few tips, and I do know how to drive in the rain. I imagine I have to be more cautious then driving in a monsoon.
The temperature has been between 20-30 degrees...cold! cold! Did I say C-O-L-D! I've decided, it's just going to be cold, so I have to get used to it.
I've been working on the slave head space thing. Had Master prioritize my to-do list. There's still a few things on it, but I've whittled it down. Although when I was out the other day, I forgot to buy water at like three places. Felt very upset about this. I was in the "I suck" headspace, which Master was not in the mood for. Several times She addressed this with me, and I still insisted on feeling "sucky." It resulted in a long conversation about our situation and how uncomfortable we feel, and how She doesn't feel useful due to the broken leg. It's just the way things are right now, and we have to make the best of it, and it's not a very respectful thing for me to run around saying I suck. Because, in reality, I don't. And neither does She. We are still adjusting to the shock of the move. I pointed out that I'd never been in weather like this, and I've never been tested for Seasonal Affective Disorder, and that maybe the lack of sunshine, and the onset of the cold has spiraled a negative response in me that I wasn't recognizing. Yeah, we might be burning lightbulbs, but right now, neither of us need to spiral into depression. And light combats the S.A.D.
So we work on the Master/slave Dynamic. I work on my language, and being respectful, and we both work on adjusting to the situation, surroundings, and not being in our own home. And I'll keep my chin up, and continue to be as good a slave boy as possible.
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12.02.05
10:45 p.m.
I was a bit better today and actually got out of the house! I went to purchase a printer/copier/scanner, for a really good price at Target. I've been utilizing the scanner and finding out what works best. I haven't had one to play with in a while.
I also got some grocery shopping done, and got to talk to a very dear friend whom I miss so much (well I miss everyone!) It's so great to know that some people can walk a certain path and discover things, and continue to grow through all of the hard work it takes to become enlightened, and evolved.
I'm so glad I'm feeling better. Yesterday was horrendous. Spent most of the day in bed wanting to puke my guts out. Master was attempting to get me out of bed, when I came to the living room, she saw how bad I was feeling and relieved me of any further duties for the day. Maybe I burned most of it out. I'm still coughing, but not nauseous and feeling like my stomach has been kicked in by a giant.
I also had the energy to clean up the living room a bit tonight. That felt really good. It was really starting to feel claustrophobic in here. Hopefully tomorrow I'll have the energy to tackle the office. I'm just afraid that by the time I have all this worked out it will be time to get on back home. Median temperature during the day? 35 degrees. I'm not a happy lizard boy!
Time to go get some sleep. I'm going to have some new images for the slideshows in a few days, so keep an eye out for those. I really do have to create some working space for working on images, both video and still; working on converting the albums to mp3's, and working on the collage idea I have for the TV altar. (after being confounded for about 6 years, I finally figured out what I want to do, now it's about how to apply that idea!). Organization is ever so important for the process of art. And we aren't organized. It would help Master out immensley to have everything available, in order to alleviate boredom and being stir crazy. I am just about stir crazy myself, but am working hard on staying centered and focused.
At least I feel better, lets hope it sticks!
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