02.03.05
6:45 a.m.
I've realized that i haven't been particularly articulate in this journal...but it is my journal, and sometimes i don't feel very eloquant.
I will make the attempt to be a bit more articulate about matters in my life. The feedback for this site, however, indicates that the way i write is ok with the folks out there in cyberland.
The search for a new housemate continues. I have a strong potential lead...negotiations continue. It will take a few days, and some conversing to make it happen. I feel fairly positive about this one...there are some questions to ask, and some realities that concern me.
Master wants intimate attentions. By 9:30 p.m. i'm falling asleep on the floor. We've cycled back to the "if you want sex, drag me into the bedroom by 9:00 p.m. otherwise, i'm out for the count. Don't know why. Work isn't busy, i don't do that much when i get home in the afternoons. All i can think of is the stress i've been under. There is not one day a week that i can sleep in until 10 a.m. That needs to change. Master gaining confidence about driving the car would be a big help. Then She could take Herself to work on Mon or Tues, and i could SLEEP!
In preparation for the PR i cleaned up the great room last night. Got stuff rearranged and off the floors. It feels good to have all that space, again.
I was able to get help on how to give the desks support. It will involve more purchase, and more screws, sanding and painting, but i hope to have all three of them finished by next Tuesday. My computer will be off this little table, and i won't have to sit on the floor any more to do work!!!! Don't get me wrong. I like the floor, however, to get stuff done i need to get done, i really need desk.
That's the news of the day. Off to feed Master breakfast, and go to work.
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02.01.05
9:30 a.m.
i've been a busy busy slave boy, what with work, and trying to get the house organized. I have the basic "desks" built. Master doesn't seem overly fond of them, *sigh*. I've spent a lot of time on them...and i really don't know which way to go now. At least two of them are finished. I can start on the big one, but we do have support problems. A friend is coming over tonight, maybe she can help me figure it out.
Need to organize the garage stuff. I've been keeping up with the kitchen. There's more stuff to do in the bedroom. And there's the added financial stress. PB decided he can't stay here. So now we really do have to find someone else to move in, but there aren't many folks to choose from. Both of us are concerned, and we are just trusting that the Universe put us here for a reason, and that it will work out. What i do understand about the universe is that we have to the footwork! That means finding a life-style friendly, pagan-minded, queer person to live with us, who can also afford the rent.
Master is having serious doubts about getting into this house. So am i, but i've learned to let Master do the worrying, i just try to accomplish as much as i can on my time off. Work has been slow, no extra shifts, so i need to get in contact with the Stage hand company and get some work on my days off. It is tough because much of the work is on weekends...
How is my service to Master??? It's been up and down. Lately feeling more subservient, more like i want to obey, and follow Her orders. Since the move there has been so much to do, so She hasn't been giving me lists. She hasn't changed my affirmation, and i haven't been remembering to say it. (Not a particularly hard one this time around). Every once in awhile i remember, and say it to myself.
We attempted some time for Beating the other night, but i got too cold, and we had to abort. So not much going on in the erotic department either. Shucks, kinda feels like a "normal" life, except that i know better . I have a collar around my neck that means ain't nothing "normal" about this life with Master.
We are still looking for that third person...a couple more leads, but nothing solid. It's hard to get together with someone when all one's time is sucked by moving, and arranging, and just keeping an even keel. Things will start looking up, i know that, and then we'll have more time to put into the Search.
And we have a short month...
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