I am a spiritual being. It defines my life. If i weren't in search of "Something greater than...", i would be very unhappy. i have studied many disciplines and theologies, practiced different kinds of spiritual ways. I have come to a conclusion: when i looked up Gnosticism, i found an affinity for what i believe in.

The truth is within. We, as a species, have attempted to define our existence since we first stood upright. We have attempted to justify our violent nature through the pacifist's view. God is a vengeful and mean God because we are vengeful and mean to each other. God is good and kind because we are good and kind. Look within and what do you see? i believe that knowledge is the key to the truth. That self-awareness is the only salvation i need.

The religious attempt to control my behavior through dogmatic practices; and telling me what i can do with my body, and my sex; telling me how to think and act, are practices born out fear. Fear of difference. If i am differently gendered, or different in my sexual orientation, if i am different in my sexual practices, and the way i think, i feel that is MY business. Not the business of a governing religious body that is fearful of what they do not understand.

After studying, and reading, and debating. After becoming "born again" at the age of twenty; after thinking i was buddhist because of a girlfriend, and then just agnostic, i have decided that i am none of these things. I am not a christian. I am not a Wiccan. Pagan just means "...Rural people," (go look it up) so i cannot even call myself pagan.

I just am. I am a part of a Being that somehow managed to create the Universe, and other beings that managed to create this world. How all of the theologies got split and redefined isn't mine to debate.

What will we say about current icons in 100 years?

back to the top

back to: past musings